YOU GOTTA LOVE GARFIELD'S EXPLANATION -- TOO TRUE!!!
A lot of folks can't understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in our country.
~~~
Well, there's a very simple answer.
~~~
Nobody bothered to check the oil.
~~~
We just didn't know we were getting low.
~~~
The reason for that is purely geographical.
~~~
Our OIL is located in:
~~~
ALASKA
~~~
California
~~~
Coastal Florida
~~~
Coastal Louisiana
~~~
Coastal Alabama
~~~~
Coastal Mississippi
~~~~
Coastal Texas
~~~
North Dakota
~~~
Wyoming
~~~
Colorado
~~~
Kansas
~~~
Oklahoma
~~~
Pennsylvania
Utah
~~~
And
Texas
~~~
Our dipsticks are located in DC
~~~
Any Questions?
NO? Didn't think so.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Monday, December 19, 2011
Dilemma
I was just notified that the web hosting for Bailey Acres is set to expire January 1st.
They are also increasing the price. My original cost was $3.95 per month. They are now going to charge $8.95 per month. That jumps the cost from $47.40 to $107.40 per year; an increase of over 150%!!
I am seriously considering not renewing the hosting. This will affect not only Bailey Acres, but the subdomains of JohnStuff, Batwing's Beat and the TV Lounge Podcast as well.
I haven't decided what to do yet.
They are also increasing the price. My original cost was $3.95 per month. They are now going to charge $8.95 per month. That jumps the cost from $47.40 to $107.40 per year; an increase of over 150%!!
I am seriously considering not renewing the hosting. This will affect not only Bailey Acres, but the subdomains of JohnStuff, Batwing's Beat and the TV Lounge Podcast as well.
I haven't decided what to do yet.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
I Voted Democrat
1. I voted Democrat because I believe oil companies' profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 43% isn't.
2. I voted Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.
3. I voted Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine, as long as nobody is offended by it.
4. I voted Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves.
5. I voted Democrat because I believe that people who can't tell us if it will rain on Friday can tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don't start driving a Prius.
6. I voted Democrat because I'm not concerned about millions of babies being aborted, so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.
7. I voted Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free health care, education, and Social Security benefits.
8. I voted Democrat because I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrats see fit.
9. I voted Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe groups who would never get their agendas past the voters.
10. I voted Democrat because I think that it's better to pay billions to people who hate us for their oil, but not drill our own because it might upset some endangered beetle or gopher.
11. I voted Democrat because while we live in the greatest, most wonderful country in the world, I was promised "HOPE AND CHANGE".
12. I voted Democrat because my head is so firmly planted up my ass, it's unlikely that I'll ever have another point of view.
2. I voted Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.
3. I voted Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine, as long as nobody is offended by it.
4. I voted Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves.
5. I voted Democrat because I believe that people who can't tell us if it will rain on Friday can tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don't start driving a Prius.
6. I voted Democrat because I'm not concerned about millions of babies being aborted, so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.
7. I voted Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free health care, education, and Social Security benefits.
8. I voted Democrat because I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrats see fit.
9. I voted Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe groups who would never get their agendas past the voters.
10. I voted Democrat because I think that it's better to pay billions to people who hate us for their oil, but not drill our own because it might upset some endangered beetle or gopher.
11. I voted Democrat because while we live in the greatest, most wonderful country in the world, I was promised "HOPE AND CHANGE".
12. I voted Democrat because my head is so firmly planted up my ass, it's unlikely that I'll ever have another point of view.
Monday, October 31, 2011
It Matters!
WHEN - he refused to disclose who donated money to his election campaign, as other candidates had done, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he received endorsements from people like Louis Farrakhan, Mummar Kadaffi and Hugo Chavez, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - it was pointed out that he was a total newcomer and had absolutely no experience at anything except community organizing, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he chose friends and acquaintances such as Bill Ayers and Bernadine Dohrn who were revolutionary radicals, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - his voting record in the Illinois Senate and in the U.S. Senate came into question, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he refused to wear a flag lapel pin and did so only after a public outcry, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - people started treating him as a Messiah and children in schools were taught to sing his praises, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he stood with his hands over his groin area for the playing of the National Anthem and Pledge of Allegiance, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he surrounded himself in the White House with advisors who were pro-gun control, pro-abortion, pro-homosexual marriage and wanting to curtail freedom of speech to silence the opposition, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he said he favors sex education in kindergarten, including homosexual indoctrination, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - his personal background was either scrubbed or hidden and nothing could be found about him, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - the place of his birth was called into question, and he refused to produce a birth certificate, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he had an association in Chicago with Tony Rezco - a man of questionable character and who is now in prison and had helped Obama to a sweet deal on the purchase of his home - people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - it became known that George Soros, a multi-billionaire Marxist, spent a ton of money to get him elected, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he started appointing White House Czars that were radicals, revolutionaries, and even avowed Marxist /Communists, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he stood before the Nation and told us that his intentions were to "fundamentally transform this Nation" into something else, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - it became known that he had trained ACORN workers in Chicago and served as an attorney for ACORN, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed cabinet members and several advisors who were tax cheats and socialists, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed a Science Czar, John Holdren, who believes in forced abortions, mass sterilizations and seizing babies from teen mothers, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed Cass Sunstein as Regulatory Czar who believes in "Explicit Consent," harvesting human organs without family consent and allowing animals to be represented in court, while banning all hunting, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed Kevin Jennings, a homosexual and organizer of a group called Gay, Lesbian, Straight, Education Network as Safe School Czar and it became known that he had a history of bad advice to teenagers, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed Mark Lloyd as Diversity Czar who believes in curtailing free speech, taking from one and giving to another to spread the wealth, who supports Hugo Chavez, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - Valerie Jarrett, an avowed Socialist, was selected as Obama's Senior White House Advisor, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - Anita Dunn, White House Communications Director, said Mao Tse Tung was her favorite philosopher and the person she turned to most for inspiration, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed Carol Browner, a well known socialist as Global Warming Czar working on Cap and Trade as the nation's largest tax, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed Van Jones, an ex-con and avowed Communist as Green Energy Czar, who since had to resign when this was made known, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - Tom Daschle, Obama's pick for Health and Human Services Secretary could not be confirmed because he was a tax cheat, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - as President of the United States, he bowed to the King of Saudi Arabia, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he traveled around the world criticizing America and never once talking of her greatness, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - his actions concerning the Middle East seemed to support the Palestinians over Israel, our long time ally, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he took American tax dollars to resettle thousands of Palestinians from Gaza to the United States, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he upset the Europeans by removing plans for a missile defense system against the Russians, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he played politics in Afghanistan by not sending troops early-on when the Field Commanders said they were necessary to win, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he started spending us into a debt that was so big we could not pay it off, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he took a huge spending bill under the guise of stimulus and used it to pay off organizations, unions, and individuals that got him elected, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he took over insurance companies, car companies, banks, etc., people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he took away student loans from the banks and put it through the government, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he designed plans to take over the health care system and put it under government control, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he claimed he was a Christian during the election and tapes were later made public that showed Obama speaking to a Muslim group and 'stating' that he was raised a Muslim, was educated as a Muslim, and is still a Muslim, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he set into motion a plan to take over the control of all energy in the United States through Cap and Trade, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he finally completed his transformation of America into a Socialist State, people woke up--- but it was too late. Add these up one by one and you get a phenomenal score that points to the fact that Barrack Hussein Obama is determined to turn America into a Marxist-Socialist society. All of the items in the preceding paragraphs have been put into place. All can be documented very easily. Before you disavow this do an Internet search. The last paragraph alone is not yet cast in stone. You and I will write that paragraph.
Will it read as above or will it be a more happy ending for most of America?
Don't just belittle the opposition. Search for the truth. We all need to pull together or watch the demise of a free democratic
society. Pray for Americans to seek the truth and take action for it will keep us FREE. Our biggest enemy is not China, Russia, North Korea or Iran. Our biggest enemy is a contingent of politicians in Washington, DC . The government will not help, so we need to do it ourselves.
Question....will you ignore this, or pass it on to others who don't know about Obama's actions and plans for the USA, so that they may know how to vote in November, 2012 and the ensuing years?
It's your decision. I believe it does matter. How about you?
WHEN - November 2012 come it will matter who you vote for!
WHEN - he received endorsements from people like Louis Farrakhan, Mummar Kadaffi and Hugo Chavez, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - it was pointed out that he was a total newcomer and had absolutely no experience at anything except community organizing, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he chose friends and acquaintances such as Bill Ayers and Bernadine Dohrn who were revolutionary radicals, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - his voting record in the Illinois Senate and in the U.S. Senate came into question, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he refused to wear a flag lapel pin and did so only after a public outcry, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - people started treating him as a Messiah and children in schools were taught to sing his praises, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he stood with his hands over his groin area for the playing of the National Anthem and Pledge of Allegiance, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he surrounded himself in the White House with advisors who were pro-gun control, pro-abortion, pro-homosexual marriage and wanting to curtail freedom of speech to silence the opposition, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he said he favors sex education in kindergarten, including homosexual indoctrination, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - his personal background was either scrubbed or hidden and nothing could be found about him, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - the place of his birth was called into question, and he refused to produce a birth certificate, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he had an association in Chicago with Tony Rezco - a man of questionable character and who is now in prison and had helped Obama to a sweet deal on the purchase of his home - people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - it became known that George Soros, a multi-billionaire Marxist, spent a ton of money to get him elected, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he started appointing White House Czars that were radicals, revolutionaries, and even avowed Marxist /Communists, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he stood before the Nation and told us that his intentions were to "fundamentally transform this Nation" into something else, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - it became known that he had trained ACORN workers in Chicago and served as an attorney for ACORN, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed cabinet members and several advisors who were tax cheats and socialists, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed a Science Czar, John Holdren, who believes in forced abortions, mass sterilizations and seizing babies from teen mothers, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed Cass Sunstein as Regulatory Czar who believes in "Explicit Consent," harvesting human organs without family consent and allowing animals to be represented in court, while banning all hunting, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed Kevin Jennings, a homosexual and organizer of a group called Gay, Lesbian, Straight, Education Network as Safe School Czar and it became known that he had a history of bad advice to teenagers, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed Mark Lloyd as Diversity Czar who believes in curtailing free speech, taking from one and giving to another to spread the wealth, who supports Hugo Chavez, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - Valerie Jarrett, an avowed Socialist, was selected as Obama's Senior White House Advisor, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - Anita Dunn, White House Communications Director, said Mao Tse Tung was her favorite philosopher and the person she turned to most for inspiration, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed Carol Browner, a well known socialist as Global Warming Czar working on Cap and Trade as the nation's largest tax, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he appointed Van Jones, an ex-con and avowed Communist as Green Energy Czar, who since had to resign when this was made known, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - Tom Daschle, Obama's pick for Health and Human Services Secretary could not be confirmed because he was a tax cheat, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - as President of the United States, he bowed to the King of Saudi Arabia, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he traveled around the world criticizing America and never once talking of her greatness, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - his actions concerning the Middle East seemed to support the Palestinians over Israel, our long time ally, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he took American tax dollars to resettle thousands of Palestinians from Gaza to the United States, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he upset the Europeans by removing plans for a missile defense system against the Russians, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he played politics in Afghanistan by not sending troops early-on when the Field Commanders said they were necessary to win, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he started spending us into a debt that was so big we could not pay it off, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he took a huge spending bill under the guise of stimulus and used it to pay off organizations, unions, and individuals that got him elected, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he took over insurance companies, car companies, banks, etc., people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he took away student loans from the banks and put it through the government, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he designed plans to take over the health care system and put it under government control, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he claimed he was a Christian during the election and tapes were later made public that showed Obama speaking to a Muslim group and 'stating' that he was raised a Muslim, was educated as a Muslim, and is still a Muslim, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he set into motion a plan to take over the control of all energy in the United States through Cap and Trade, people said it didn't matter.
WHEN - he finally completed his transformation of America into a Socialist State, people woke up--- but it was too late. Add these up one by one and you get a phenomenal score that points to the fact that Barrack Hussein Obama is determined to turn America into a Marxist-Socialist society. All of the items in the preceding paragraphs have been put into place. All can be documented very easily. Before you disavow this do an Internet search. The last paragraph alone is not yet cast in stone. You and I will write that paragraph.
Will it read as above or will it be a more happy ending for most of America?
Don't just belittle the opposition. Search for the truth. We all need to pull together or watch the demise of a free democratic
society. Pray for Americans to seek the truth and take action for it will keep us FREE. Our biggest enemy is not China, Russia, North Korea or Iran. Our biggest enemy is a contingent of politicians in Washington, DC . The government will not help, so we need to do it ourselves.
Question....will you ignore this, or pass it on to others who don't know about Obama's actions and plans for the USA, so that they may know how to vote in November, 2012 and the ensuing years?
It's your decision. I believe it does matter. How about you?
WHEN - November 2012 come it will matter who you vote for!
Sunday, September 25, 2011
We Can be Energy Independent
As you may know, Cruz Construction started a division in North Dakota just 6 months ago.
They send every Kenworth (9 trucks) we had here in Alaska to North Dakota and several drivers.
They just bought two new Kenworth's to add to that fleet; one being a Tri Drive tractor and a new 65 ton lowboy to go with it.
They also bought two new cranes (one crawler & one rubber tired) for that division.
Dave Cruz said they have moved more rigs in the last 6 months in ND than Cruz Construction moved in Alaska in the last 6 years.
Williston is like a gold rush town; they moved one of our 40 man camps down there since there are no rooms available.
Unemployment in ND is the lowest in the nation at 3.4 percent last I checked.
See anything in the national news about how the oil industry is fueling North Dakota 's economy?
Here's an astonishing read. Important and verifiable information:
About 6 months ago, the writer was watching a news program on oil and one of the Forbes Bros. was the guest.
The host said to Forbes, "I am going to ask you a direct question and I would like a direct answer; how much oil does the U.S. have in the ground?" Forbes did not miss a beat, he said, "more than all the Middle East put together."
The U. S.. Geological Service issued a report in April 2008 that only scientists and oil men knew was coming, but man was it big.
It was a revised report (hadn't been updated since 1995) on how much oil was in this area of the western 2/3 of North Dakota, western South Dakota , and extreme eastern Montana .
Check THIS out:
The Bakken is the largest domestic oil discovery since Alaska 's Prudhoe Bay , and has the potential to eliminate all American dependence on foreign oil. The Energy Information Administration (EIA) estimates it at 503 billion barrels. Even if just 10% of the oil is recoverable( 5 billion barrels), at $107 a barrel, we're looking at a resource base worth more than $5.3 trillion.
"When I first briefed legislators on this, you could practically see their jaws hit the floor. They had no idea.." says Terry Johnson, the Montana Legislature's financial analyst.
"This sizable find is now the highest-producing onshore oil field found in the past 56 years," reportsThe Pittsburgh Post Gazette.
It's a formation known as the Williston Basin, but is more commonly referred to as the 'Bakken.'
It stretches from Northern Montana, through North Dakota and into Canada .
For years, U. S. oil exploration has been considered a dead end.
Even the 'Big Oil' companies gave up searching for major oil wells decades ago.
However, a recent technological breakthrough has opened up the Bakken's massive reserves, and we now have access of up to 500 billion barrels. And because this is light, sweet oil, those billions of barrels will cost Americans just $16 PER BARREL !!!!!!
That's enough crude to fully fuel the American economy for 2041 years straight.
U. S. Oil Discovery - Largest Reserve in the World
Stansberry Report Online - 4/20/2006
Hidden 1,000 feet beneath the surface of the Rocky Mountains lies the largest untapped oil reserve in the world.
It is more than 2 TRILLION barrels. On August 8, 2005 President Bush mandated its extraction.
In three and a half years of high oil prices none has been extracted.
With this motherload of oil why are we still fighting over off-shore drilling?
They reported this stunning news:
We have more oil inside our borders, than all the other proven reserves on earth.
Here are the official estimates:
8 times as much oil as Saudi Arabia
18 times as much oil as Iraq
21 times as much oil as Kuwait
22 times as much oil as Iran
500 times as much oil as Yemen
and it's all right here in the Western United States !!!!!!
HOW can this BE? HOW can we NOT BE extracting this? Because the environmentalists and others have blocked all efforts to help America become independent of foreign oil! Again, we are letting a small group of people dictate our lives and our economy. WHY?
James Bartis, lead researcher with the study says we've got more oil in this very compact area than the entire Middle East, more than 2 TRILLION barrels untapped. That's more than all the proven oil reserves of crude oil in the world today, reports The Denver Post.
Don't think 'OPEC' will drop its price even with this find? Think again! It's all about the competitive marketplace, it has to.
Think OPEC just might be funding the environmentalists?
They send every Kenworth (9 trucks) we had here in Alaska to North Dakota and several drivers.
They just bought two new Kenworth's to add to that fleet; one being a Tri Drive tractor and a new 65 ton lowboy to go with it.
They also bought two new cranes (one crawler & one rubber tired) for that division.
Dave Cruz said they have moved more rigs in the last 6 months in ND than Cruz Construction moved in Alaska in the last 6 years.
Williston is like a gold rush town; they moved one of our 40 man camps down there since there are no rooms available.
Unemployment in ND is the lowest in the nation at 3.4 percent last I checked.
See anything in the national news about how the oil industry is fueling North Dakota 's economy?
Here's an astonishing read. Important and verifiable information:
About 6 months ago, the writer was watching a news program on oil and one of the Forbes Bros. was the guest.
The host said to Forbes, "I am going to ask you a direct question and I would like a direct answer; how much oil does the U.S. have in the ground?" Forbes did not miss a beat, he said, "more than all the Middle East put together."
The U. S.. Geological Service issued a report in April 2008 that only scientists and oil men knew was coming, but man was it big.
It was a revised report (hadn't been updated since 1995) on how much oil was in this area of the western 2/3 of North Dakota, western South Dakota , and extreme eastern Montana .
Check THIS out:
The Bakken is the largest domestic oil discovery since Alaska 's Prudhoe Bay , and has the potential to eliminate all American dependence on foreign oil. The Energy Information Administration (EIA) estimates it at 503 billion barrels. Even if just 10% of the oil is recoverable( 5 billion barrels), at $107 a barrel, we're looking at a resource base worth more than $5.3 trillion.
"When I first briefed legislators on this, you could practically see their jaws hit the floor. They had no idea.." says Terry Johnson, the Montana Legislature's financial analyst.
"This sizable find is now the highest-producing onshore oil field found in the past 56 years," reportsThe Pittsburgh Post Gazette.
It's a formation known as the Williston Basin, but is more commonly referred to as the 'Bakken.'
It stretches from Northern Montana, through North Dakota and into Canada .
For years, U. S. oil exploration has been considered a dead end.
Even the 'Big Oil' companies gave up searching for major oil wells decades ago.
However, a recent technological breakthrough has opened up the Bakken's massive reserves, and we now have access of up to 500 billion barrels. And because this is light, sweet oil, those billions of barrels will cost Americans just $16 PER BARREL !!!!!!
That's enough crude to fully fuel the American economy for 2041 years straight.
U. S. Oil Discovery - Largest Reserve in the World
Stansberry Report Online - 4/20/2006
Hidden 1,000 feet beneath the surface of the Rocky Mountains lies the largest untapped oil reserve in the world.
It is more than 2 TRILLION barrels. On August 8, 2005 President Bush mandated its extraction.
In three and a half years of high oil prices none has been extracted.
With this motherload of oil why are we still fighting over off-shore drilling?
They reported this stunning news:
We have more oil inside our borders, than all the other proven reserves on earth.
Here are the official estimates:
8 times as much oil as Saudi Arabia
18 times as much oil as Iraq
21 times as much oil as Kuwait
22 times as much oil as Iran
500 times as much oil as Yemen
and it's all right here in the Western United States !!!!!!
HOW can this BE? HOW can we NOT BE extracting this? Because the environmentalists and others have blocked all efforts to help America become independent of foreign oil! Again, we are letting a small group of people dictate our lives and our economy. WHY?
James Bartis, lead researcher with the study says we've got more oil in this very compact area than the entire Middle East, more than 2 TRILLION barrels untapped. That's more than all the proven oil reserves of crude oil in the world today, reports The Denver Post.
Don't think 'OPEC' will drop its price even with this find? Think again! It's all about the competitive marketplace, it has to.
Think OPEC just might be funding the environmentalists?
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
How Mormon if Mitt Romney?
It helps if you are LDS to understand all the references, but I thought they were pretty funny -
How Mormon is Mitt Romney?
by Joanna Brooks
Earlier this week, Florida evangelical Christian leader John Stemberger endorsed Rick Perry’s campaign for GOP presidential nominee. According to Stemberger, Perry was more “trustworthy†on social conservation issues like abortion rights.
On Romney, Stemberger said: “The issue not that he is a Mormon. The issue is that he wasn’t Mormon enough. If he had been consistent with traditional Mormon values his whole career, that would make me feel a lot more comfortable about where he’s coming from.â€
Mitt Romney. Not Mormon enough. Yeah. Right.
Stemberger’s ludicrous assessment of Mitt Romney’sMormonism inspired an eighteen-hour-stream of “Mitt Romney is so Mormon jokes†on Twitter at @askmormongirl. I’m reprinting the best here, with thanks to the comic geniuses of the Mormon Twitternacle.
(Just a note: for some of these, you may have to be Mormon to understand.)
So, how Mormon is Mitt Romney?
Mitt is so Mormon he’s related to the other Mormon presidential candidate and half of his own campaign volunteers as well.
Mitt is so Mormon his campaign bus is a pioneer handcart.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d call 19-year-old boys to serve as US ambassadors.
Mitt is so Mormon his Israel policy will be centered on Jackson County, Missouri.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll make the income tax a flat 10% and collect fast offerings to fund Medicaid.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll ask the Senate to “sustain†his appointees by manifesting with an upraised hand.
Mitt is so Mormon he doesn’t do Pilates, he does golden Pilates.
Mitt is so Mormon that his campaign “oppo†team has done all the other candidates’ genealogy.
Mitt is so Mormon he’s organizing his precinct walkers in pairs to knock doors with a very special message.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d make the Book of Mormon required reading at the Bureau of Indian Affairs.
Mitt is so Mormon, that if he’s elected the “FirstLady†will be known as the “First Wife.â€
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll choke up and weep during his inaugural address. And then say, “I told myself I wasn’t going to cry.â€
Mitt is so Mormon he’d commission a presidential motorcade built entirely of 10-passenger family vans.
Mitt is so Mormon, he will actually hang the Constitution up by a thread, just so he can save it.
Mitt Romney is so Mormon that he’s afraid to join the Tea Party because of Doctrine & Covenants 89.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll start the State of the Union with the words: “I wasn’t going to get up, but the Spirit just carried me up here.â€
Mitt is so Mormon his campaign biography begins, “I, Willard, having been born of goodly parents.â€
Mitt is so Mormon, he will ask members of Congress to go home and pray about his economic plan.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d ask the Elders Quorum to move himinto the White House.
Mitt Romney is so Mormon that his first act will be to make July 24 a national holiday.
Mitt is so Mormon, he asks donors to stack chairs after fundraising dinners.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll award Ty Detmer, Steve Young, and Jimmer Fredette Congressional Medal of Honor.
Mitt is so Mormon he refers to expatriates as “apostates†and non-US citizens as “Gentiles.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that his campaign slogan is “What do you know about Mitt Romney? Would you like to know more?â€
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll reroute the Freedom Trail through Palmyra, New York, Nauvoo, Illinois, and Winter Quarters, Iowa.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll rename the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms the Word of Wisdom squad.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d do an ad for the LDS Church: “I’m a husband, father, and leader of the free world. And I’m a Mormon.â€
Mitt is so Mormon he isn’t as concerned about getting American youth jobs as he is about getting them married.
Mitt Romney is so Mormon he tried to convince CNN to let him bring a visual aid to the debate so he could turn it into an object lesson.
Mitt is so Mormon that he refers to Congress as “The Great and Spacious Building.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that out of “concern for the one†he’ll invite Kim Jong-Il to join the fold.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll end every address with “hope you all get home without any harm or accidents.â€
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll assign a friend to every new member of Congress.
Mitt is so Mormon he’s already picked out a room in the White House for his year’s supply of wheat and beans, and he’llrequire the White House Chef to rotate the food storage.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll replace the Secret Service with the Danites.
Mitt is so Mormon his Secret Service codename will be Mahonri Moriancumr.
Mitt is so Mormon he thinks Harvard is the BYU of the east.
Mitt is so Mormon he thought the debt ceiling was something that could only happen in a temple.
Mitt is so Mormon, he doesn’t campaign: he “fellowships.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that he’s installing two basketball hoops at the inaugural ball so there’s a place to hang decorations.
Mitt is so Mormon that he’ll change the name of “Cabinet Meeting†to “Correlation Meeting.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that if he got elected all of the White House Pyrex 9x13 pans would have a piece of masking tape on them with his name written in Sharpie.
Mitt is so Mormon, he has four cats named 1 Nephi, 2 Nephi, 3 Nephi and 4 Nephi. (4 Nephi is the small one.)
Mitt is so Mormon that late last night he snuck out to put 5000 plastic forks in the lawn of Jon Huntsman. And after that, he heart attacked Rick Perry.
Mitt is so Mormon that he’s going to rename the 101st Airborne as “The Stripling Warriors.â€
Mitt is so Mormon, he won’t deport illegal aliens, he’ll just disfellowship them.
Mitt is so Mormon, he’ll rename FEMA the Federal Relief Society.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll start his acceptance speech with“I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that if elected he’ll require every state to have an Official Casserole.
Mitt is so Mormon that the Marine Band will play “Praise to the Man†when he enters a room.
Mitt is so Mormon that he’ll appoint Lavell Edwards head of the Department of Defense.
Mitt is so Mormon he won’t allow advisers wearing non-white dress shirts to participate in cabinet meetings.
Mitt is so Mormon that he’ll rename the weekly presidential address “Politics and the Spoken Word.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that his cabinet would consist entirely of unqualified volunteers.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d outsource the department of education to the Boy Scouts.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d convene a linger-longer after cabinet meetings.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d hang a copy of the Proclamation on the Family and a picture of the Washington, D.C. LDS temple in the White House.
Mitt is so Mormon he has volunteers combing through old GOP voter rolls for less actives he can reactivate.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d commission a Mod Bod undershirt to be engraved under the sleeveless dress of the Statue of Liberty.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d put everyone in his stake on the inauguration invite list. Just because.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d ask the Chief Justice to use a quad at his inauguration.
Mitt is so Mormon, he will add the phrases “every fiber of my being†and “beyond a shadow of a doubt†to the presidential oath of office.
Mitt Romney is so Mormon he’d plan a youth dance festival for his first 4th of July in office.
How Mormon is Mitt Romney?
by Joanna Brooks
Earlier this week, Florida evangelical Christian leader John Stemberger endorsed Rick Perry’s campaign for GOP presidential nominee. According to Stemberger, Perry was more “trustworthy†on social conservation issues like abortion rights.
On Romney, Stemberger said: “The issue not that he is a Mormon. The issue is that he wasn’t Mormon enough. If he had been consistent with traditional Mormon values his whole career, that would make me feel a lot more comfortable about where he’s coming from.â€
Mitt Romney. Not Mormon enough. Yeah. Right.
Stemberger’s ludicrous assessment of Mitt Romney’sMormonism inspired an eighteen-hour-stream of “Mitt Romney is so Mormon jokes†on Twitter at @askmormongirl. I’m reprinting the best here, with thanks to the comic geniuses of the Mormon Twitternacle.
(Just a note: for some of these, you may have to be Mormon to understand.)
So, how Mormon is Mitt Romney?
Mitt is so Mormon he’s related to the other Mormon presidential candidate and half of his own campaign volunteers as well.
Mitt is so Mormon his campaign bus is a pioneer handcart.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d call 19-year-old boys to serve as US ambassadors.
Mitt is so Mormon his Israel policy will be centered on Jackson County, Missouri.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll make the income tax a flat 10% and collect fast offerings to fund Medicaid.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll ask the Senate to “sustain†his appointees by manifesting with an upraised hand.
Mitt is so Mormon he doesn’t do Pilates, he does golden Pilates.
Mitt is so Mormon that his campaign “oppo†team has done all the other candidates’ genealogy.
Mitt is so Mormon he’s organizing his precinct walkers in pairs to knock doors with a very special message.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d make the Book of Mormon required reading at the Bureau of Indian Affairs.
Mitt is so Mormon, that if he’s elected the “FirstLady†will be known as the “First Wife.â€
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll choke up and weep during his inaugural address. And then say, “I told myself I wasn’t going to cry.â€
Mitt is so Mormon he’d commission a presidential motorcade built entirely of 10-passenger family vans.
Mitt is so Mormon, he will actually hang the Constitution up by a thread, just so he can save it.
Mitt Romney is so Mormon that he’s afraid to join the Tea Party because of Doctrine & Covenants 89.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll start the State of the Union with the words: “I wasn’t going to get up, but the Spirit just carried me up here.â€
Mitt is so Mormon his campaign biography begins, “I, Willard, having been born of goodly parents.â€
Mitt is so Mormon, he will ask members of Congress to go home and pray about his economic plan.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d ask the Elders Quorum to move himinto the White House.
Mitt Romney is so Mormon that his first act will be to make July 24 a national holiday.
Mitt is so Mormon, he asks donors to stack chairs after fundraising dinners.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll award Ty Detmer, Steve Young, and Jimmer Fredette Congressional Medal of Honor.
Mitt is so Mormon he refers to expatriates as “apostates†and non-US citizens as “Gentiles.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that his campaign slogan is “What do you know about Mitt Romney? Would you like to know more?â€
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll reroute the Freedom Trail through Palmyra, New York, Nauvoo, Illinois, and Winter Quarters, Iowa.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll rename the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms the Word of Wisdom squad.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d do an ad for the LDS Church: “I’m a husband, father, and leader of the free world. And I’m a Mormon.â€
Mitt is so Mormon he isn’t as concerned about getting American youth jobs as he is about getting them married.
Mitt Romney is so Mormon he tried to convince CNN to let him bring a visual aid to the debate so he could turn it into an object lesson.
Mitt is so Mormon that he refers to Congress as “The Great and Spacious Building.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that out of “concern for the one†he’ll invite Kim Jong-Il to join the fold.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll end every address with “hope you all get home without any harm or accidents.â€
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll assign a friend to every new member of Congress.
Mitt is so Mormon he’s already picked out a room in the White House for his year’s supply of wheat and beans, and he’llrequire the White House Chef to rotate the food storage.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll replace the Secret Service with the Danites.
Mitt is so Mormon his Secret Service codename will be Mahonri Moriancumr.
Mitt is so Mormon he thinks Harvard is the BYU of the east.
Mitt is so Mormon he thought the debt ceiling was something that could only happen in a temple.
Mitt is so Mormon, he doesn’t campaign: he “fellowships.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that he’s installing two basketball hoops at the inaugural ball so there’s a place to hang decorations.
Mitt is so Mormon that he’ll change the name of “Cabinet Meeting†to “Correlation Meeting.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that if he got elected all of the White House Pyrex 9x13 pans would have a piece of masking tape on them with his name written in Sharpie.
Mitt is so Mormon, he has four cats named 1 Nephi, 2 Nephi, 3 Nephi and 4 Nephi. (4 Nephi is the small one.)
Mitt is so Mormon that late last night he snuck out to put 5000 plastic forks in the lawn of Jon Huntsman. And after that, he heart attacked Rick Perry.
Mitt is so Mormon that he’s going to rename the 101st Airborne as “The Stripling Warriors.â€
Mitt is so Mormon, he won’t deport illegal aliens, he’ll just disfellowship them.
Mitt is so Mormon, he’ll rename FEMA the Federal Relief Society.
Mitt is so Mormon he’ll start his acceptance speech with“I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that if elected he’ll require every state to have an Official Casserole.
Mitt is so Mormon that the Marine Band will play “Praise to the Man†when he enters a room.
Mitt is so Mormon that he’ll appoint Lavell Edwards head of the Department of Defense.
Mitt is so Mormon he won’t allow advisers wearing non-white dress shirts to participate in cabinet meetings.
Mitt is so Mormon that he’ll rename the weekly presidential address “Politics and the Spoken Word.â€
Mitt is so Mormon that his cabinet would consist entirely of unqualified volunteers.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d outsource the department of education to the Boy Scouts.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d convene a linger-longer after cabinet meetings.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d hang a copy of the Proclamation on the Family and a picture of the Washington, D.C. LDS temple in the White House.
Mitt is so Mormon he has volunteers combing through old GOP voter rolls for less actives he can reactivate.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d commission a Mod Bod undershirt to be engraved under the sleeveless dress of the Statue of Liberty.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d put everyone in his stake on the inauguration invite list. Just because.
Mitt is so Mormon he’d ask the Chief Justice to use a quad at his inauguration.
Mitt is so Mormon, he will add the phrases “every fiber of my being†and “beyond a shadow of a doubt†to the presidential oath of office.
Mitt Romney is so Mormon he’d plan a youth dance festival for his first 4th of July in office.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
17 Miracles
At the beginning of the week LaRue and I drove out to Provo for a doctor's appointment. The night before the doctor visit we decided to go to a movie. When we got to the movie complex there was only one that was starting within a few minutes -
Here's a description from the 17 Miracles website:
A Pioneer Film Like You’ve Never Seen Before
As part of the Willie Handcart Company, Levi Savage (Jasen Wade) feared that leaving late in the season would lead to despair and death. What he came to find out is that for every tragedy, there is a multitude of miracles.
Based on unbelievable actual events, and brought to you by filmmaker T.C. Christensen (Praise to the Man, The Work and the Glory), 17 Miracles will open your eyes to the stories of the Mormon Pioneers as you have never seen them before. Something extraordinary is about to happen.
You can read some of the actual journal entries of the main character, Levi Savage, on Facebook.
We both enjoyed the movie a lot. It's heartbreaking to think about all the hardships they endured, but truly inspiring to see some of the miracles they experienced.
The movie left me with some questions which I will have to research to find the answers; specifically, about some of the characters portrayed in the movie.
I'm buying this one.
Here's a description from the 17 Miracles website:
A Pioneer Film Like You’ve Never Seen Before
As part of the Willie Handcart Company, Levi Savage (Jasen Wade) feared that leaving late in the season would lead to despair and death. What he came to find out is that for every tragedy, there is a multitude of miracles.
Based on unbelievable actual events, and brought to you by filmmaker T.C. Christensen (Praise to the Man, The Work and the Glory), 17 Miracles will open your eyes to the stories of the Mormon Pioneers as you have never seen them before. Something extraordinary is about to happen.
You can read some of the actual journal entries of the main character, Levi Savage, on Facebook.
We both enjoyed the movie a lot. It's heartbreaking to think about all the hardships they endured, but truly inspiring to see some of the miracles they experienced.
The movie left me with some questions which I will have to research to find the answers; specifically, about some of the characters portrayed in the movie.
I'm buying this one.
Saturday, June 18, 2011
The Demolition of Ashley School
The pictures say it all. The old Ashley School where LaRue taught prior to retiring has been torn down.
Monday, June 13, 2011
Oregon Trip
On May 25th LaRue and I packed up the car to drive to Provo. We had arranged for Liz and Gary to take us to the airport the next day and leave our Alero with them. We got our car all packed and ready to go. But when we got in to leave it wouldn't start! I got the neighbor to come over and help me give it a jump. Still wouldn't start.
We ended having to have Gary and Liz drive out to Vernal, pick us up and haul us to Provo.
The next day we had no trouble getting to the airport. One nice thing about LaRue using a cane to walk - airport personnel got her a wheelchair and pushed her to wherever we needed to go. We also got to board the plane first.
The flight to Portland was about 20 minutes late, but Laurie's friend, Rachel, who was picking us up, was also delayed in traffic due to an accident. So the timing actually worked out well.
From the airport it's about a 30-40 minute trip to Andy and Laurie's house in Hillsboro.
Here are some flowers in front of Andy's house:
One day while Andy was working, LaRue, Laurie, Asher and I went shopping. When we stopped for lunch a big train hauling logs and wood went through the intersection.
Asher loves trains and watched as every train car rolled by:
The area behind the housing development where they live is a protected wetland area:
LaRue and I by some flowers:
More flowers by their house:
Asher and me out by the car:
One evening we drove to the Portland Temple:
Me, Asher and LaRue at a fountain on the Temple grounds:
Laurie, Andy and Asher at the fountain:
Andy and I playing a game of Zombie Dice:
This is a quilt Laurie was hand stitching for the baby when he's born:
We fixed and fired up the grill one evening. Asher loves to pick and toss grass:
Laurie working on the quilt:
Andy at the grill:
That evening we also watched a Michael Jackson concert on dvd. Asher was not only watching with us, he had to get up and dance:
Andy cuts the grass:
There is a really nice park just outside their housing complex. We all went over there one afternoon:
At the park there is this guy - a huge Indian head:
While taking car of Asher I learned a lot about Thomas the Tank Engine. Asher loves to play with the toy trains:
If you look closely you can see the raccoon just behind the cement wall:
Now it's time for Rowan Klaus Bailey! Here's the scale reading when he was born:
Laurie and Rowan:
Rowan gets a newborn birthday cake:
Asher helps blow out the candle:
Asher gives Rowan a present:
A little quilt:
And a rattle:
Grandma and Grandpa with Rowan:
Andy and Rowan:
A kiss from Asher:
We got these flowers for Laurie while she was in the hospital:
Getting ready to come home:
Eyes open:
We spent a lot of time playing on the floor with Asher, his trains and cars:
Laurie's friend Rachel:
On Friday June 10 we flew back to Utah. Liz and Gary picked us up and the airport and we met up with Robin and family at the Chuck-A-Rama restaurant in Salt Lake:
After spending the night in Provo, LaRue, Gary, Liz and I drove down to Manti to deal with a storage unit we have there. As you can tell from the padlock, we hadn't been there in quite some time:
Finally, Liz and Gary one last time at their house in Provo before the big move to Missouri:
Oh.....about the Alero. Robin, Emily and the kids came to Vernal over the Memorial Day weekend. They planned to stay for most of that next week. Robin said he would look at the car. He said it started right up for him everytime. So, he wasn't able to diagnose the problem.
I think it's the starter and/or solenoid. I suspect the solenoid is getting old and sticky. So I'm just going to have to drive it and see what happens. Fortunately, with Robin and his family headed back to California for another couple of months he loaned me his truck.
Overall, it was a wonderful trip to Oregon.
We ended having to have Gary and Liz drive out to Vernal, pick us up and haul us to Provo.
The next day we had no trouble getting to the airport. One nice thing about LaRue using a cane to walk - airport personnel got her a wheelchair and pushed her to wherever we needed to go. We also got to board the plane first.
The flight to Portland was about 20 minutes late, but Laurie's friend, Rachel, who was picking us up, was also delayed in traffic due to an accident. So the timing actually worked out well.
From the airport it's about a 30-40 minute trip to Andy and Laurie's house in Hillsboro.
Here are some flowers in front of Andy's house:
One day while Andy was working, LaRue, Laurie, Asher and I went shopping. When we stopped for lunch a big train hauling logs and wood went through the intersection.
Asher loves trains and watched as every train car rolled by:
The area behind the housing development where they live is a protected wetland area:
LaRue and I by some flowers:
More flowers by their house:
Asher and me out by the car:
One evening we drove to the Portland Temple:
Me, Asher and LaRue at a fountain on the Temple grounds:
Laurie, Andy and Asher at the fountain:
Andy and I playing a game of Zombie Dice:
This is a quilt Laurie was hand stitching for the baby when he's born:
We fixed and fired up the grill one evening. Asher loves to pick and toss grass:
Laurie working on the quilt:
Andy at the grill:
That evening we also watched a Michael Jackson concert on dvd. Asher was not only watching with us, he had to get up and dance:
Andy cuts the grass:
There is a really nice park just outside their housing complex. We all went over there one afternoon:
At the park there is this guy - a huge Indian head:
While taking car of Asher I learned a lot about Thomas the Tank Engine. Asher loves to play with the toy trains:
If you look closely you can see the raccoon just behind the cement wall:
Now it's time for Rowan Klaus Bailey! Here's the scale reading when he was born:
Laurie and Rowan:
Rowan gets a newborn birthday cake:
Asher helps blow out the candle:
Asher gives Rowan a present:
A little quilt:
And a rattle:
Grandma and Grandpa with Rowan:
Andy and Rowan:
A kiss from Asher:
We got these flowers for Laurie while she was in the hospital:
Getting ready to come home:
Eyes open:
We spent a lot of time playing on the floor with Asher, his trains and cars:
Laurie's friend Rachel:
On Friday June 10 we flew back to Utah. Liz and Gary picked us up and the airport and we met up with Robin and family at the Chuck-A-Rama restaurant in Salt Lake:
After spending the night in Provo, LaRue, Gary, Liz and I drove down to Manti to deal with a storage unit we have there. As you can tell from the padlock, we hadn't been there in quite some time:
Finally, Liz and Gary one last time at their house in Provo before the big move to Missouri:
Oh.....about the Alero. Robin, Emily and the kids came to Vernal over the Memorial Day weekend. They planned to stay for most of that next week. Robin said he would look at the car. He said it started right up for him everytime. So, he wasn't able to diagnose the problem.
I think it's the starter and/or solenoid. I suspect the solenoid is getting old and sticky. So I'm just going to have to drive it and see what happens. Fortunately, with Robin and his family headed back to California for another couple of months he loaned me his truck.
Overall, it was a wonderful trip to Oregon.
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